o The Mulligan. A "dire emergency only" phone number kept nonchalantly by the phone.
o The One-Armed Bandit. Perfunctory prayers.
o The Dead Shark. Imaginary, i.e. motionless, "progress".
o The Caspar Milquetoast. Cheering on sweating and weary Christian soldiers from the comfort and safety of the sidelines.
o The Bugs Bunny. "Eh, what's up, Doc?"
o The Short-Sheet. Confining the study of Christian Science solely to the Bible and "Science and Health".
o The Micawber. Confidence that in time something wonderful is going to turn up even though efforts in the direction of spiritualizing thinking have been desultory at best.
o White Lightening. A materialized sense of God and His creation.
o The Tar Baby. Reacting pugnaciously to the claims of sin or aggressive mental suggestion. Duking it out mano a mano with the Adversary.
o The Drive-Thru. Shortcuts along the straight and narrow Way.
o The Tweet. Reducing one's repertoire of Christian Science to a convenient Rolodex of apothegms and bon mots.
o The Pyrite Ploy. Prospecting for anything that glitters.
o The Wedgie. Attempting to succeed with a lite version of the new man.
o Hobson's Choice. Choosing the best among materialism's many delightful offerings.
o Primrose Path Christian Science. . . . ian Science.
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20 comments:
Cleverly done. You are so talented, Christian!
Really enjoyed reading these. Glad you're back on as I've been checking everyday.
Thanks!
Humility compels me to admit I see myself in a couple of these. Really well put, I must say.
Such a creative blog. Very fresh/original. A pleasure to read, sir or madam.
I really liked this. But can't quite get the final item.Someone explain this to me.
Thanks a lot for this. Entertaining to me. I like several of these, and can certainly see myself in them. I will do better!
To me, the most shameful on your list is the one who sits on the soft sideline and cheers on those who are giving their all to Christ's work!
Dear Christian,
Thanks for keeping us informed and for giving us a laugh now and then. Enjoyed this thoroughly -
Your item "Short-Sheet" interests me. Are you hinting at looking to the periodicals--though from past posts I'd say not--so do you mean other writers than from the Publishing Society? Perhaps the Blue Book and Red Book? Actually, I'm thinking of John W. Doorly, London, England; Peggy Brook, London, England (you can obtain their writings through the Bookmark, though you have to ask); or Max Kappeler, the KIR Institute in Seattle, WA; or perhaps Hendrick DeLonge or John Hargreaves, published by the Mulberry Press....
Just wondering what limb you are stepping out on.
Good job, blogger. You are one of my favorites. Keep up the superior writing.
One of the commenters thinks Christian is hinting at the periodicals? He or she must be a new reader surely. If anyone hews to the Bible and our Leader's transcendent writings, and who loves the early strong writing in the Sentinel and Journal it is the author of this blog. Can't believe Christian would go off in those questionable directions metaphysically!
Such fresh thinking and writing. Sticky wickets, indeed!
Dear Sir,
Your excellent blog post calls to my thought a statement from the pen of our inspired Leader, Mary Baker Eddy where she says, in essence, that it is only by unremitting effort that we win the crown.
Sincere thanks,
Your drive-through CS makes me think of something our great Master said. Jesus makes it clear there is only one path that doesn't lead to destruction--the narrow one. At least it seems that way to the worldly-minded who prefer the short and easy way to satisfaction now. But just think of the dead-end that way.
Thank you for keeping the pressure on us CS's. With the glorious promise we have in the teachings of Christ Jesus and the writing of Mary Baker Eddy, we just cannot afford to rest content while so many in this world need to know about God and His unconditional love for us!
I find your website, and the comments, quite helpful. My thanks to all!
Anent "The Short-Sheet." MBE stipulates in the Manual:IV.1 (p. 34) that as a qualification for church membership that "The Bible, together with Science and Health and other works by Mrs. Eddy, shall be his only textbooks for self-instruction in Christian Science, and for teaching and practising metaphysical healing." "Textbooks for self-instruction" is clear enough; the operative term is "shall be" and "only." This is not "confining the study of CS solely to the Bible and 'Science and Health'" with in implication that there is something pejorative in this restriction. There is not. Personally, I think that if one truly understands the paragraph known as the scientific statement of being were fully understood in all its implications and ramifications, it would be the study of a lifetime. Reading less and thinking more, and above all practicing what little we do understand would do much more than anything else on CS ever written, including the periodicals in their present lamentable state. So, Christian, I can't unreservedly endorse this particular sticky wicket, the "The Tweet" is worthy of a hearty guffaw and "The Pyrite Ploy" and "Primrose Path" are spot-on. Have you heard the parodies on TV commercials on the "Daily Lift" from the Board of Lectureship? And certainly some of the more tasteless and politically correct efforts of CSPS are "...ian Science" to a T.
I surprise myself, but think I actually agree with Lowlywise on what we are to "study".
Sooner or later Christian Scientists have to learn that they cannot study their way into heaven!
Interesting discussion on the "Short-sheet" item. I agree with LowlyWise about the Manual and the textbooks for self-instruction in Christian Science. But I'm also reminded what Mrs. Eddy writes in S&H, "A few books, however, which are based on this book, are useful." (Pref. x). She also wrote, same page, "She (the author, Mrs. Eddy) has made no effort to embellish, elaborate, or treat in full detail so infinite a theme." I'm sure the periodicals were intended to fulfill to some extent the need to "embellish, elaborate, and treat" in fuller detail the infinite nature of the subject, it being, after all, an infinite Science. Mrs. Eddy in no-wise indicates that the periodicals should be the only means for fuller spiritual enlightenment. The presence of the Bookmark assures us that there is a wonderful "library" of Christian Science literature available to the student today, which I'm sure Mrs. Eddy expected. It is, of course, inherent upon the individual to be discerning in what he reads, and to determine by his own understanding what is and what is not legitimate Christian Science. (Consider this blog as a case in point). Christian Science is, as Mrs. Eddy also wrote, a discovery of what she defined as "Love's divine adventure to be all in all." Pursuing this adventure means dropping the swaddling clothes of limited personal thinking, and adopting the spiritual mentality of one eager to grow and develop in limitless fashion after the infinite idea. It is the acme of self-discovery as the child of God.
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